23.1 hours played
Written 4 days ago
Ahoy, Swoonds here.
Have you ever wanted to roleplay as a Jedi with severe brain damage, no regard for Jedi ethics, and a pathological need to force lightning innocent NPCs into giblets just to hear them scream?
Have you ever wanted to join a noble space monastery, only to immediately steal a lightsaber, hop in a stolen speeder, and war crime your way across the galaxy?
Then, boy oh boy, do I have the game for you:
Star Wars: Jedi Knight – Jedi Academy.
🛸 The Premise
You are Jaden Korr, an extremely customizable Jedi student who arrives at Luke Skywalker’s bootleg Hogwarts for Force-sensitive weirdos.
You can choose your race, gender, saber color, fighting style, and whether or not you’ll completely disregard your teachings the moment someone says the word "power."
Your first mission?
Survive the academy.
Your final mission?
Become the Jedi equivalent of a coked-up Sith accountant with a double-bladed saber and an anger problem.
Also, there’s a plot about some Sith cult trying to resurrect a dead dark lord using the ancient Star Wars tradition of sucking Force juice out of monuments like a capri sun.
It's dumb.
It’s wonderful.
It’s Star Wars.
⚔️ The Gameplay
At its heart, Jedi Academy is a lightsaber simulator disguised as a third-person shooter.
You get Force powers, multiple saber styles, and a rich combat system where you can:
Force push a stormtrooper off a cliff.
Kick a Sith Lord in the nuts mid-backflip.
Dismember an entire room of cultists in a single beautiful, accidental swing.
And get your own head removed if you time it wrong.
Combat is fast, satisfying, and sometimes broken in the most delightful ways.
Saber duels feel like a ballet of death performed by two caffeinated toddlers in robes.
🧠 The AI & Level Design
The enemy AI is... questionable.
Stormtroopers are Olympic-level sharpshooters with the reaction time of a meth addict.
Sith cultists, on the other hand, will:
Jump backwards off cliffs
Whiff saber throws at the wall
Try to do fancy midair spins and die instantly from fall damage
And the level design?
An absolute fever dream.
You'll go from:
Sinking sand temples
To Imperial bases made of 95% catwalks and death pits
To Tatooine where a Jawa hijacks your speeder and you have to chase him like a bounty hunter on bath salts
It's like they gave every level to a different developer with no communication and a shared hatred for OSHA standards.
🌌 The Force Powers
The best part of Jedi Academy is the freedom to not be a Jedi at all.
You can:
Choke civilians
Shoot lightning out of your fingers
Throw your lightsaber like it’s a fidget spinner from hell
Slow down time like you’re doing a Warhammer Slaanesh cosplay
Want to be a good boy?
Pick Force Heal, Absorb, and Mind Trick.
Want to become Darth Anklebreaker?
Pick Grip, Rage, and Force Drain like you're feeding on orphans for fun.
The Jedi Code says:
"There is no emotion, there is peace."
Jedi Academy says:
"There is no peace, only massive Force repulsion-based homicide."
🎮 Customization & Sabers
Lightsabers are like condoms in this game.
You start with one, and later they ask if you want two. Or a double-bladed one.
The dual sabers are for "I watched too many prequel fights and think I’m hot shit."
The double-blade is for "I want to spin like a Beyblade and hope everyone else dies before I do."
Either way, dismemberment is encouraged.
You can even enable it fully with a console command (g_sabermorerealistic 2) and suddenly the Jedi Order becomes Quentin Tarantino’s lightsaber LARP.
🤖 Kyle Katarn
You’re trained by Kyle Katarn, the man, the myth, the entire beard of justice.
He’s the Chuck Norris of Star Wars Expanded Universe.
Stole the Death Star plans before Rogue One made it trendy
Turned down being a Sith Lord because he got bored
Canonically once fought a dark Jedi with just his fists
Sounds like he smokes death sticks for breakfast and snorts midichlorians
He’s your mentor, and like any true master, he will do nothing to help you unless the plot demands it.
Half the game is him calling you on the Jedi Nokia saying:
“Good job, Jaden. Also, don’t die.”
Then immediately hangs up.
💀 Multiplayer Madness
Multiplayer in Jedi Academy is...
Well.
It’s a medieval battle arena with anime physics, modded skins, and 200 ping latency saber duels that last 12 minutes.
People fly through the air, screaming
You can bunnyhop like a cracked-out rabbit on steroids
Half the server is dueling
The other half is RP walking and typing “/emotesitsdown” in chat
And then a dude named “Darth_xX420Sn1p3zXx” walks in and kills the entire server with a rocket launcher before getting vote kicked.
🏆 Final Verdict
Jedi Academy is unhinged.
It’s janky.
It’s stupid.
It’s wonderful.
It lets you:
Build your Jedi
Go on galactic field trips
Blow people up with Force powers
And stab your way through the entire Sith religion like it's a buffet line
It's the closest Star Wars has ever gotten to Jedi sandbox perfection.
And it still holds up better than most modern games because it knows exactly what it is.
A glorified saber whacking simulator where you can throw people off bridges with your mind and call it justice.
10/10
Would force push a Gamorrean into a lava pit again.